– You Do You, Boo

HEY WRITER, do you know that successful people tend to look at criticism as feedback? And no, that doesn’t mean that all criticism is correct.

It goes without saying that the word criticism has a negative connotation. It can easily make us defensive and resistant to the benefits we could potentially draw from it. I would argue that compliments and criticisms are two sides of the same coin. Simply put, they’re a currency that can be utilised in your favour.

People who have a healthy relationship with criticism use feedback to make decisions. In the same way compliments encourage behaviour, feedback can discourage it. Listening to the criticism, and treating it like feedback, leaves you with a number of choices. You can, for example:

Ignore it

Implement it

Consider it


Discuss it

Just remember, the fact that you’ve received critical feedback doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to do something about it. How you react, and what you do, is entirely up to you.

In this series, I’m trying to provide you with a veritable smörgåsbord of options. Because, at the end of the day, you need to find the ones that work for you. 

First of all, you need to decide the merit of the critique. Who is the sender? What kind of relationship do you have with them? Does their opinion matter to you? Does it hold any weight? Do they have any authority over your behaviour? Questions like these will help you work out whether the feedback you’ve received is helpful or hurtful.

It's Ok to Ignore It

Ignoring criticism is perfectly ok, but before you do you need to make sure you’re doing it for the right reasons.

It’s possible, and sometimes even prudent, to ignore criticism. Some people aren’t offering critique with your best interest at heart. Likewise, if you know that what you’re doing is the right course of action for you, disregarding the criticism is the appropriate response.

Having said that, there’s always value in hearing tough truths or considering the impact your actions may have had on someone else. You also need to consider that context. What, exactly, are you being criticised for. Are you being willfully ignorant or blatantly oppressive? Like some writers, whose names I won’t mention here, who exploit indigenous cultures or say/write hurtful things about stuff they don’t understand? Then maybe you need to apologise and educate yourself before you say anything else on the subject.

Did you make an honest mistake? Say something that was misunderstood. misinterpreted or misconstrued? Just apologise and move on.

Is the criticism addressing something that boils down to personal preference? Are they being rude or trolling you? Did they complain about something that has nothing to do with you? Ignore it and move on.

Ultimately, only you can decide if you want to ignore the feedback you received. Think about which action aligns with your end game and stick with that.

Implement It, Maybe?

Implement criticism that serves you. Sometimes the feedback you can draw from it is a new perspective, and they can be highly valuable. We can’t know everything, and we can’t think of everything.

Sometimes swift criticism can help you avoid making mistakes or blunders. Sometimes it helps you understand the perspective of your audience better. Take writing groups, beta readers or critique buddies as an example. When they tell us something about our writing, what are they actually saying? What is crystal clear to us, who wrote it and know the headcanon, may be confusing to readers. 

Author Brandon Sanderson mentions in one of his lectures (on his youtube channel) how he wrote a book that confused all of his critique buddies. He had picked a name that suggested they were reading about a Greek hero, but nothing that happened matched that expectation. Luckily, he found out and implemented the criticism by changing the name. To Elantris, which subsequently become his first published novel. 

Implementing changes based on feedback is helpful when the criticism is righteous and makes sense. Sometimes what feels like criticism is actually someone looking out for your best interests.

Should You Consider It?

The choice is yours, but my answer to this question is yes. Considering the feedback is always a good idea. Unless you can tell right away that you’re dealing with a troll, of course.

You don’t have to take immediate action when someone offers you critical feedback. Sometimes (almost always) there are benefits to waiting and considering the feedback over time. That can be anything from a day to a few years, by the way, depending on the situation.

In business, critical feedback is often accumulated over time to be used in the decision-making process. As a writer, you can do the same thing. Save the criticism you get in reviews, comments, feedback etc over time and see if you can find any patterns or themes in them that you can use as reference points when making future decisions.

Discuss It With Someone

Critical feedback should be a two-way street. There should be a discussion with clarifying questions. Solid feedback serves everyone better when you understand the motives behind it and are able to ask for details.

People with a healthy relationship to feedback aren’t triggered by criticism. They use it as an opportunity to engage rather than to close themselves off.

It’s important to establish a healthy relationship with criticism. Because it will happen. Unless you write only for your own pleasure, but if you’re reading this I assume you want to publish what you’re writing. And there will be times when the criticism stings.

If you work on your ability to differentiate between useful criticism andthings you can ignore, you will soon develop your own healthy relationship to criticism. I’m not saying it won’t hurt or annoy you once you have, but it sure makes it easier to deal with. In fact, learning to see criticism as an important source of feedback can enrich your life and help make you a better writer and a stronger person.

Questions of the Day:

– Can you ignore criticism?

– How do you decide what to do with criticism?

Let’s talk in the comments below, or send me your response via socials or email.

Thank you for stopping by! I hope you enjoyed your stay and look forward to seeing you again.

Much love,

//E. 😘

© Evalena Styf, 2020

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